Over the last couple of months, I had been living foul. Not 'I'm murdering people' foul, but enough to know that I was way too far down the rabbits hole and I needed to get out. Once I made the decision that I wasn't going to be in there anymore, I did three things. These are things that I believe that if you find yourself in the same position I was (refusing to live in your foulness and determined to do better) that you do as well. You can't expect a different result if you keeps taking the same steps, so try these:
1. Give it completely to God
There's a feeling of relief when you completely give a situation over to God and let Him handle it.
It's a daily process, but the initial step of confessing what you've been doing, sincerely asking for forgiveness, and allowing the forgiveness and mercy to power your willingness to be in His will is a freeing feeling. And be specific!!! Don't do a general, 'Lord, please forgive me for my stuff' type of prayer. Be real. Say 'Lord, please forgive me for gossiping about my sister in Christ. Please forgive me for entertaining that inappropriate conversation. Please forgive me for putting this person before you.'
2. Tell your mentor/accountability partner!!
Be completely honest. Keep it all the way 💯. Tell them every part. You might feel embarrassed, hurt, stupid, whatever, but your mentor is the person you should be able to go through all those emotions with. You need people to hold you accountable and love you through your growth. Not only that, they might be able to give you their testimony so if you get the crazy idea that you're alone in this or you're the only person on the planet who has done it, you have proof that someone experienced what you have and they lived to tell the tale.
3. Change your behavior and stay committed to the change.
Your can't expect to truly change if you are not going to change anything in your day to day. With that being said, be honest with yourself. If you struggle with gluttony, you wouldn't just go to the store with no plan. You make a list that you are determined to stick to. Maybe the first few times you take someone with you who will help you stay on track and hold you accountable.
If your struggle is person related, you have to go cold turkey. Cut all communication and remove any reason to talk to them. I'm not going to lie and say it's easy, especially if it's someone you care about, but it's necessary if you are trying to grow and that situation is blocking your progress.
Whatever your struggle is, seek God, make a plan, and see it through. I believe that God honors our push to be in His will and will give us what we need to get back on track with Him (make sure you're doing your part and you're actually seeking Him daily).
I hope this helps someone. It's been helping me and even with the consequences I'm thankful to serve a God who's patient with me. And don't beat yourself up too bad because trust me, God can even take your foolery and use it for His good. I'm a witness.