....But I'm good at it.

At least I think so. 

I haven't had any complaints πŸ˜‰.

But, I shouldn't know that I'm good at it. At least not yet. 

I lost my virginity when I was 17. I was late compared to my peers, which I think played a part in me wanting to do it in the first place.  

I can remember my daddy telling me that all boys wanted was to get into my panties and they weren't to be trusted.  That what I had belonged to God and I didn't have to right to give it away till I had a ring. That sounded good in theory, but by the time he started trying to hammer this, I had done just about everything expect the actual act, which I thought was ok. 

Looking back, I wish I would've listened. We spend more time telling people (especially girls; but I'll save that for another post) to not have sex as opposed to why we shouldn't have sex. They don't tell you that once you start...

It's EXTREMELY HARD to stop!!

That it clouds your judgement. 

That in most cases, it leads to all types of emotional, physical, psychological, and health related drama that could've been avoided had you kept your goodies to yourself.

Now let me be clear, this is a no judgement zone. I'm not going to encourage you to bust it open, but I understand how it happens.

I like sex... A lot and over the years, I can honestly say that it's the thing I struggle with the most during my Christian walk. There are times where I'm really strong and I stand my ground, but I also go though times of deep sea diving in my foolery.

Foolery being sex in this scenario lol.

And when I'm deep see diving, It's hard for me to come up for air... 

And to be completely honest, I don't always want to, especially if it's good. 

But then God always catches me during one of the times when the haze isn't as thick and reminds me that this isn't what He has for me. He reminds me that He loves me enough to pull me out, if I let Him.  

He reminds me that when I get married, I won't have to worry about the crash. 

(The crash is the moment after you've had sex and you're on this crazy high, then conviction sets in and you feel like poop on a stick. I believe that if you have a personal relationship with God, that crash happens faster than when you and God aren't in the same page.)

Moral of the story, when I get my ring, it's going to be bomb and guilt free!  

I'm writing this to encourage you to fight. That It's ok if in this moment you're deep sea diving in the foolery, but you don't have to stay there. We all make choices and you can choose to not be in this place. Ask God to help you and stay around people who will encourage you and hold you accountable. 

And don't get discouraged! We all fall short. If you mess up, sincerely pray and ask for forgiveness, forgive yourself, and let it go. Your testimony is in your push. 

Whew! That was a lot lol... 

And that was for me.... 

See you guys later✌🏿️